O THIS guy gets a flat tire out on a rural road. He pulls over and starts to change the tire, putting the lug nuts in the overturned hubcap (just like you are supposed to). There is a ditch full of tall grass next to the road, and on the far side of the ditch, a long, tall chain-link fence.

After a few minutes he realizes that he is being watched. He looks up and sees a man standing on the other side of the fence. The man is wearing pajamas, a robe, and fuzzy bunny slippers. The first guy then notices the barb wire along the top of the fence. "Oh, hell," he thinks, "the state hospital. This guy must be a nut. I hope he's not an ax-murderer or something."

The first guy continues changing the tire, but it is hot and he starts to get rattled--the second guy is just standing there. Watching. He finally manages to get the spare on and turns to get the lug nuts. His hand slips, he flips the hub cap, and fwing! the lug nuts go flying into the tall grass. "DAMN!!" he screams. "Now what am I going to do!?! I'm screwed!!" He stomps around, flailing his arms and pulling his hair. "Now what am I going to do?!?"

The voice is low and calm. "Just take one nut off of each of the other tires and use them on the spare." "Huh? Who said that?" It's the guy in the fuzzy bunny slippers. "I said, 'just take one nut off of each of the other tires and use them on the spare.' There is a service station just a couple of miles down the road, just outside of town. You'll be fine."

"Wow. Oh course! That's a great idea!! I never would of thought of that. Hey, you seem to have your act together. What are you doing in there?"

The voice is low and calm. "I'm crazy. I'm not stupid."

This page was last updated Thu 25 Jan 96.
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